Wendy's Window: 2012

Monday, October 8, 2012

The Day of the Girl

This week I would like to bring attention to and highlight that the United Nations established October 11th as "The International Day of the Girl." The purpose of this day is to bring attention, celebrate, discuss and advance the lives of girls across the globe. It is believed when girls (and people) come together to discuss what really matters to them and what is real in their lives, new ways of thinking , stereotypes, discrimination and other real issues can be confronted and eradicated.

We at Forgiving For Living, Inc., know the power that comes when young ladies believe in themselves and are able to become all that they are meant to be. The campaign to establish October 11th as "The Day of the Girl," was led in the United States by School Girls Unite. The leading parties encouraged girls and organizations across the world to unite on this day in some sort of solidarity to show that girls matter and that we care.

According to the official website of this project, "history shows that it hasn't ever been easy to be a girl, and despite awesome changes in the status and perception of women and girls, herstory is still a complicated and challenging one." Issues that young ladies still deal with today are: illiteracy, violence, abuse, abandonment, self image issues and sex trafficking to name a few. The parent body believes that in order for us to tackle the issues that face our girls today, we have to identify them as barriers and actually put programs and plans in place to help them reach their potential. Forgiving For Living, does such through our Ambassador Mentor Programs, Workshops and our Annual Conference. Together we will stand across Southern California in our T-shirts showing that we care and they matter!

Ironically, "The Day of the Girl" falls on the birthday of Eleanor Roosevelt, who happened to be at one time the First Lady and Chair of the United Nations Commission on Human Rights. I feel that both she and our current First Lady, Michelle Obama are wonderful examples and roles models for our girls! There are many that we can proudly say have paved the way, but what are you doing to make a difference and touch the life of a young lady?

Healing Without Hate: It's a choice. It's a lifestyle. Pass it on!

Visit www.WendyGladney.com & www.forgivingforliving.org. You can email her at wendy.gladney@gmail.com. Also follow her blog: Wendygladney.blogspot.com. Wendy is featured on Radio Free 102.3 KJLH on Dominique DiPrima's Front Page Friday Mornings @ 5:00am.

Friday, August 24, 2012

A New Season is Around the Corner

Where did summer go? I feel like we blinked and summer disappeared. Isn't that just like life. As the seasons ebb and flow and we transition from one to another, the same happens as it relates to the ups and downs or trials and tribulations that come our way. Labor Day weekend seems to mark the end of summer (although with the school system starting earlier and earlier it seems like summer ends way before Labor Day). As we bring the last sunny lazy days to an end and we prepare for Fall it's time for us to buckle down and get back on course with our dreams and goals.

I like the visual scenario that shows Summer as light and airy, whereas Fall is when we pull out sweaters, jackets, long pants and covered shoes (ie. boots), why? The reason is because the weather changes and it's time for us to cover up and "protect" ourselves. I believe the same is true as it relates to some of the personal things in our life. It's very important that we access what is ahead for us and then take inventory to prepare by protecting what we know is our purpose and calling.

Oftentimes we see people that always look successful and we get a little jealous. What I've learned is you have to put in the time. There's no short cut to success. No matter what it is you have to be willing to work your soil, plant, water and then you will be prepared when the harvest comes. What is it that really touches your heart? What do you feel you are called to do? What is it that you keep saying you're going to do, but you keep putting it off? STOP! Today is the day for you to make good on the promises you make to yourself! Love yourself enough to be good to yourself by fulfilling the desires of your heart. It's a new season!

The key is to keep your focus. Don't look at what other people are doing, that's their calling. If you keep your eyes on your own dreams, you will receive the prize. What do they say, "the grass won't be greener on the other side if you take the time to water your own grass."

Healing Without Hate: It's a choice. It's a lifestyle. Pass it on!

Sunday, August 12, 2012

Work While It Is Yet Day

For the past several weeks it seems like every time I turn around someone close to me made their transition from this life to the next. It's sobering because it really shows the brevity of life. As I reflect on my childhood growing up with my grandmother she always seemed to be in full motion doing something. In my childlike tone I would ask her, "why are you always so busy?" She would respond by saying, "there's a lot of work that needs to be done and it will be night soon."

Of course I didn't totally comprehend what she meant back then, but as I continued to grow and progress through life the scripture found in John 9:4 where it says: "I must work the works of him that sent me, while it is day; the night cometh, when no man can work, " resonated in my ears loud and strong. What I also find hilarious is that now my children and various friends and family members often say to me, "Wendy go sit down somewhere." Well, as my grandmother said, I can't because there's much work that needs to be done.

The problem I think with many of us is we are often "busy" but are we really taking care of "business?" Do we have purpose? Do we add value? Do we make the lives of the people we touch better in some kind of way, or are we draining? Are we negative? Do we drag people down because in reality we're not really happy with our own lives.

This past week Forgiving For Living held a workshop in Riverside for young ladies between 13 - 18 years old focusing on health and life skills. Interestingly on the very day we did our workshop a news story broke that stated a sex-trafficking ring was identified right in the Inland Empire. The story said "gang members used Inland Empire High Schools to recruit underage girls (12 - 15) to work as prostitutes in the Los Angeles area according to the FBI."

If we want our lives to matter and mean something we must be mindful of our youth. So many things that were fought for in previous generations are being destroyed right before our very eyes. What does that say about us and what we are allowing to happen on our watch? If you don't know where to begin or what to do regarding "working while it is yet day" start with a young person that crosses your path!

Healing Without Hate: It's a choice. It's a lifestyle. Pass it on!

Monday, August 6, 2012

Voter Suppression

Whatever happened to the "lazy days of summer?" There's so much that needs attention and we shouldn't sit by and not help where we can. Yes we have to pace ourselves and stay balanced, but I also want to encourage all of us to find something that we can get behind, be informed and help.

Recently I've been paying more attention to what's going on regarding "voter suppression." Our ancestors fought and died for us to vote and now there are measures being taken to try and reverse those victories. If we think about it the U.S. Constitution and the Voter Registration Act are both being challenged. Several states across the country are dealing with strategies to try and discourage voting. The ones being effected the most are African Americans, Latinos, women and the elderly. Think about it, who's left?

Part of the tactics being used are imposing burdensome regulations, restricting voter registration, and straight out intimidation. I can't help but wonder why all of this now? Does it have anything to do with some not wanting to see a black man serve a second term as President of the United States? Could hatred today still run that deep? We also know it goes back to money and power.

If you don't know what to do or how this may affect you and your ability to vote, call your local assembly person's office or your state senator. You can also contact the voter registration office in your county. Don't sit on the sidelines and let years of blood, sweat and tears be for nothing. Ignorance is not an answer. Dr. King once said, "nothing in the world is more dangerous than sincere ignorance and conscientious stupidity."

My grandmother lived to be close to a century. During her lifetime she was active in human and civil rights. I wouldn't want to face her in heaven and she ask me why didn't I do what I was supposed to do and I then have to ask her for forgiveness. Who in your life do you have to answer to?

Healing Without Hate: It's a choice. It's a lifestyle. Pass it on!

Monday, July 9, 2012

Summer Is A Great Time To Rest, Relax & Rejuvenate!

Last week I took a very needed vacation to Maui and had a fabulous time. There are things in life we are taught are "extras" and sometimes we have to convince ourselves we even deserve such things. After dealing with so many ups and downs and even some real disappointments in life, I've learned to appreciate and enjoy what life brings whenever possible.

Years ago I was hit by a truck in a car accident and I was pregnant with my son Freddie (who is now 23) so you know it was a long time ago. The Insurance company and my doctor made me get regular massages in order to "relax me and the baby." Ultimately they wanted to make sure I didn't go into premature labor and something go wrong with my child and I sue them. Again, just like a vacation, I felt that a massage was an "extra" only for special occasions. However, I realized it was actually a real necessity to help me get through that situation so I would have a positive outcome (a healthy baby).

I am blessed to travel from time to time and oftentimes it is tied in with work. This is great, but when you travel for work, your mind is on work (or at least it should be) and you don't have the opportunity to really rest, relax and rejuvenate. If we want to be our best on a regular basis we have to allow ourselves some time to let go and release. In the 10 Steps of "Healing Without Hate: How To Forgive To Live, learning to "Release" is step number 4. I've learned during these times of rest I am able to reflect and take stock of where I am, where I want to go, what I need to do next to accomplish whatever it is on my heart, mind and list.

Summer is in full swing and now is the time to take life a little slower, if you're not able to take a trip to some exotic destination, we are blessed to live in one of the most sought out destinations in the world, "Sunny Southern California." Pack up your car, go to the beach, leave your cell phone behind and just enjoy you! It's also a good time to take inventory of where you are personally half way through the year with the goals you've set for yourself. It's not too late to get your groove back and finish the year strong, but take some time out to rest, relax and rejuvenate! This may be the necessity you need in your life right now to get you through. Release and just let it go!

Healing Without Hate: It's a choice. It's a lifestyle. Pass it on!

Thursday, June 28, 2012

Obamacare Yes!

By now most of us have heard about the controversial Affordable Care Act introduced by President Obama that was passed in 2010. The proponents of this Act guarantees that all Americans would have health care, but mandates that all Americans have health insurance. We are familiar with this concept because we have to secure car insurance and proof of that insurance if we drive a car.

This past week the United States Supreme Court upheld the constitutionality of the Affordable Care Act, also known as "Obamacare." What caught a lot of people by surprise in this decision was Chief Justice John Roberts, who's known to be quite conservative, served as the swing vote to make it 5 - 4. Why is it that the parties have to be so divided on such a matter that is vital for all Americans? Instead of focusing on repeal and replace can we figure out a way to come together as one and build a stronger health care for all under the current Administration.

It was brought up and discussed this Act is just a disguise for another tax. Well don't we have to pay taxes on just about everything in order to have the quality of life we all desire? We've all heard that where much is given much is required. We didn't get in this position over night and it won't go away over night. Although this Act does not go into effect until 2014, we must start preparing now.

Forgiving For Living, Inc., serves at risk and underserved women and girls that have experienced abuse and or abandonment. Part of our mission is to help them in the areas of health and life skills. What better way than for them to be provided a level of peace of mind through the guarantee of health care.

Healing Without Hate: It's a choice. It's a lifestyle. Pass it on!

Saturday, June 23, 2012

Lest We Forget

Last week I had the opportunity to travel to Savannah and Charleston for business and pleasure. I'm glad I had a chance to not only plant seeds that hopefully will grow into a fruitful business opportunity, but I was also able to visit historical sites, take tours throughout the cities, and walk the grounds of Plantations with former slave quarters. I must admit It was sobering and humbling all at the same time.

This trip was especially touching for me because I'm in the process of working on my family tree and roots (and believe me this takes patience and time). Although my paternal side of the family is from the South, they are primarily from the state of Texas, however, I remember hearing my grandmother say we had some "Geechee" in our background. As a child I wasn't sure what that meant, but as I grew I came to understand that the "Geechee" people came from sections of Louisiana, the Carolinas and Georgia. This trip allowed me to learn more about this part of my background.

As I walked through the small slave quarters (they were the actual quarters, not replicas, close to 200 years old), I could feel the memories, pain and hopes of our ancestors. As I journeyed through some of the oldest African American churches in this country, I was able to see holes in the floor in the shape of diamonds that allowed air and sound to pass for those traveling through the underground railroad. As I visited the Civil Rights Museum I could see the progress we've made as a people, but what I found sad is that with all the ground that's been covered, there's still so much to be done. I also found a level of prejudice where I actually heard a white tour guide say the slaves were happy on the Plantations. People on the tour would not speak up (except for me, I had to say something). I couldn't believe it. Of course there are a lot of good people in this world, but sometimes if we don't speak up a few bad apples can spoil the whole bunch.

If we're not careful anger and bitterness will build and resume in the hearts and minds of mankind. Martin Luther King, Jr., once said, "injustice anywhere is a threat to justice everywhere." It's up to us to forgive the past, but we must learn from it so we don't allow it to be repeated. Forgiveness does not mean forgetting. The Schomburg Center in New York created "Lest We Forget" which documents the triumph over slavery. Teach our children the truth and let your voice be heard.

Healing Without Hate: It's a choice. It's a lifestyle. Pass it on!

Monday, June 18, 2012

The Train Is Moving Are You On Board?

Recently I had a conversation with a dear friend who shared a quote he received and it said, "If you're absent during my struggle, don't expect to be present during my success."

Overall I do understand what the author means by saying if you can't be with me in the rough times, why would I want to share the good times that come my way after I've put in all of the work. There are definitely a lot of people that jump on a train only when it's running and moving forward, but as I thought about the whole message, I also feel that it takes some people a moment to even realize what's going on, let alone know to get on board!

Don't write off everyone just because they may have been a little slow with getting on board and understanding your program, dream or vision. They may be the very caboose you need. Caboose's were once used and thought of as a functional part of the train. It is clear that a train can operate without a caboose, but it originally was meant to provide shelter at the rear of the train for those that had to work in the back (which historically we know who that meant). Conductors also often handled business from a table that was located in the caboose and sometimes it had to serve a their living quarters for long trips. So cabooses serve(d) a purpose.

I recently had the opportunity to travel down South and I visited Savannah, Georgia and Charleston, South Carolina. While visiting I also learned a lot about the beginnings of the railroad system that was laid across the South and how slave labor and Freedman (free black men) that were incarcerated were used to build these systems. They were slaves to the railroad. Historically we've heard a lot about the Pullman Porters, the dining car cooks and waiters, but we've not heard much about the ones who had to do the back breaking work of the digging, construction, and laying track. This work was not for the faint of heart, many died hard deaths from this work, including women and children. (You can learn more about it by reading Railroads in the African American Experience by Theodore Kornweibel, Jr.).

I can't go into all that touched me regarding this subject, but more than ever, I want to encourage everyone to learn to forgive a little, the brother or sister who may have been a little slow, may be the one that saves you down the road when you least expect it. The train is still moving!

Healing Without Hate: It's a choice. It's a lifestyle. Pass it on!

Sunday, June 10, 2012

Fahter's Day

According to Wikipedia, Father's Day is a celebration honoring fathers and celebrating fatherhood, paternal bonds, and the influence of fathers in society. What I find interesting is just a month ago (May), we celebrated Mother's Day and the stores were packed, the restaurants were standing room only, and more flowers and candy were delivered than any other day of the year. Whereas for Father's Day many stores only have two rows of cards in the stationery sections.

There's so much attention given to mothers, and being a mother I appreciate it. For many, including myself, we had disappointing relationships with our fathers or no relationship. However, truth be told, we wouldn't exist or be here if we didn't have "fathers." It takes a man and a woman to bring a child into this world. For those of you (us) that have strained relationships with our fathers, I encourage you to be bold and make a leap of forgiveness, reconciliation and demonstrate love towards your father this year. You may say, Wendy you don't know what I've been through, you are correct, I don't, but I know what I went through and how my relationship healed between me and my father after I experienced abuse, because I was willing to extend an olive branch, so I know there's hope.

Sometimes when people disappoint their loved ones, or themselves for that matter, they don't know how to ask for forgiveness. Sometimes they may even feel they are too deep to get out. It all starts with two words, "I'm sorry." I also want to say for the wonderful men out there that are great fathers, great surrogate fathers who stand in the shoes where fathers are missing, we applaud you for doing what should be done.

A local "tradition" during Father's Day Weekend is attending the Playboy Jazz Festival at the Hollywood Bowl. An icon associated with this weekend is "TV Dad", Bill Cosby. So I will close with one of his quotes, "Every closed eye is not sleeping, and every open eye is not seeing." So fathers be careful the example you show your children whether you think they are looking or not. They just may be peeking at you right now!

Healing Without Hate: It's a choice. It's a lifestyle. Pass it on!

Monday, June 4, 2012

Forgiveness Is Not An Emotion, It is a Decision

Life is full of twists and turns and we never know what a day may bring. This past week my daughter was robbed and my neighbor of 19 years passed away. I felt so many emotions sweep through me in just 24 hours. When life hits you with a blow, there's a difference between when it hits another family verses when it hits your own family. I've also learned that when you stand for something you are constantly being tested!

After I received the call from my daughter and I knew she was okay, I told her to hang up and call the police and her apartment complex management company. Then my son and I jumped in the car and drove out to be with her and to see exactly what was going on. As a mother "bear", I had to make sure my "cub" was safe. When we arrived the police were there doing their investigation and the property management company sent out a handyman to board up the window the intruders broke into and change the locks on her door. While we were standing there, looking around the place assessing the damage the intruders did, all I could say was "thank you Lord for protecting my child!"

As usual, my mind took me back to my philosophy on forgiveness. Once I knew my daughter was okay, I began to tell her we have to be grateful she was not harmed, broken things can be fixed and stolen things can be replaced, but I could never have another her! Next, I told her we had to pray for the individual(s) that did this. Hurt and desperate people do desperate things. Although I DO NOT condone what this person did, I know that we have to learn to forgive. Forgiveness DOES NOT mean a perpetrator should go free and not be held accountable. Justice helps with the process of forgiveness, but forgiveness is not based on an emotion, but rather a choice or decision.

A few days after the incident, I was reading and I ran across a story from Holocaust Survivor, Corrie ten Boom. Her family died in the concentration camps during the war and later when she survived, she began a ministry of forgiveness helping other survivors. One day when she was speaking at an event, she came face to face with one of the guards from Ravensbruck, the concentration camp where she and her sister were held. After she completed her speech, the guard came up to her and told her he was touched by her speech, then he extended his hand and asked her for forgiveness. He did not remember her specifically, but he still wanted to seek her forgiveness. Although it was hard for Corrie to take his hand, eventually she did. Later she shared that forgiveness is an act of the will and that our emotions don't always align with our choices. I'm grateful we are alive to be the ones that have the opportunity to forgive.

Healing Without Hate: It's a choice. It's a lifestyle. Pass it on!

Tuesday, May 29, 2012

Something Better Will Come Along

A couple of months ago after having a discussion with one of my friends she encouraged me to share more about the 10 steps connected to Forgiving For Living, Inc., In March I shared the overview, but so much has been in the news that took me away from focusing on discussing the steps, however, recently while reviewing the different posts on my facebook home page I ran across the following quote, "When you finally let go of the past something better comes along." It was like a light bulb came on and I stopped dead in my tracks. Why is it something we already know to be true takes a lifetime to understand? I think part of what hit me was the fact it ties into the overall mission of "Healing Without Hate: How To Forgive To Live"TM 10 Steps (and specifically step #4).

Step #4 is called RELEASE. This step talks about the importance of letting the things that hold you back in your life go! When I am speaking on this subject I often share an exercise that visually (and physically) shows the attendees the power of negative energy and what happens when we hold onto it. For example, take your hands and ball them up into a tight fist and squeeze as hard as you can for about 10 seconds, then slowly open your hands with your palms faced upward. As you open your fists, you will feel a light tingly feeling slowly releasing from your hands and really touching your whole body.

When we hold onto anger, bitterness and unforgiveness we are giving life to negativity and things such as diseases, cancer and pain to grow in our bodies. However, when we learn to let the past be in the past and forgive those that have offended us (so they no longer have power in your life), we free up our internal bodies to live a better and longer life.

What's interesting is when we think of our personal and professional lives, the choices and decisions we make, will determine our future and ultimately our destiny. If we want new things in our lives, we have to let go of the past so that the future has a door to enter. As my grandmother would say, get out of your own way and stop blocking your blessings!

Healing Without Hate: It's a choice. It's a lifestyle. Pass it on!

Sunday, May 20, 2012

Memorial Day & Hunger Games

This past week my son Freddie and I saw the movie, "Hunger Games." I know this was a movie many of you saw weeks ago and I am on the late train. The story is set in a future where the Capitol selects a boy and a girl from the 12 districts that make up their universe to fight until their death on live television. The heroine in the movie, Katniss Everdeen, volunteers to take her younger sister's place when she's selected for the latest match. There are many things that caught my attention in this movie, and like any type of "war" people hate death and ultimately have a compassionate heart towards mankind.

In the movie, Katniss who is from District 12, was helped by a young little black girl that is from District 11 ( the purpose of "Hunger Games" is one out of the 24 people that go in will come out a live) so for this young girl from District 11 to help Katniss from District 12, she is sacrificing the possibility of her own life. A friendship develops and when the young girl from District 11 is killed, Katniss shows compassion towards her through a kind and loving burial. This also sets the stage for Katniss to have purpose and have a heart to survive.

This week I wanted to share a thought regarding Memorial Day and the movie, "Hunger Games" stayed on my mind. The two have a theme that is intertwined. We all want to live for a purpose and to survive.

Memorial Day is a federal holiday set aside to remember the men and women who died while serving in the United States Armed Forces. This holiday has evolved and is now celebrated in several ways from picnics, to fireworks and the decorating of loved ones graves. As I continued to do some research on this holiday, I also learned something I never knew, blacks in Charleston, also known as "Freedmen," organized a May Day ceremony covered by the New York Tribune Newspaper. Our history tells us that "our" loved ones also served and died in serving our country dating back to the Civil War. Frederick Douglass said, "Once let the black man get upon his person the brass letter, U.S., let him get an eagle on his button, and a musket on his shoulder and bullets in his pocket, there is no power on earth that can deny that he has earned the right to citizenship."

Although "Hunger Games" was a fictional story, the theme of mankind caring for one another even in the worse of circumstances, is the same even in real life war. Peter the young man from District 12 in the movie, made the statement that he did not want to lose who he was, and even if he was to die, he didn't want "them" (the ones in charge) to think they owned him.

In closing, I want to say thank you to everyone who has fought and died to keep all of us free!

Healing Without Hate: It's a choice. It's a lifestyle. Pass it on!

Monday, May 14, 2012

President Obama Says Yes to Same Sex Marriage

Last week the President changed the game when he sat down with ABC News' Correspondent, Robin Roberts to discuss his views and stand regarding same sex marriage. After looking at the interview, I decided to peruse through different articles to see what was being said. When I saw the following title, "Same Sex Marriage: If Not Now, When? If Not America's First African American President, Who?" I stopped in my tracks. What a heavy burden to be placed on one's legacy.

The author of the article also quoted several influential individuals that spoke about taking a stand, or letting your voice be heard. I read the piece from Dr. Martin Luther King, Jr., that said, "There comes a time when one must take a stand that is neither expedient, that's neither safe, that's neither politic or that is neither popular, but he must take the stand because it is right."

What's interesting is the subject of gay marriage and gay rights really puts people on different sides of the fence, splits families and communities, almost like the American Civil War. Actually, this is a type of Civil War. What comes into play are moral issues, family, equality, civil rights, forgiveness and love to name a few.

As I discussed this subject with my daughter on Mother's Day, we had an open dialogue about how our faith as a Christian plays a role in our thought process, we talked about how if gay marriage is accepted, that means text books in our schools would have to be changed on how families are defined and inclusion. It means sex education would be altered on discussing how we have traditionally defined love and procreation. A lot goes into taking a stand on such an issue.

What I am discovering is that one has to be very clear on what they believe and use as their core and center when making such decisions. This subject has a rippling effect that not only goes across the river, but will flow downstream to future generations. What does your heart say?

Healing Without Hate: It's a choice. It's a lifestyle. Pass it on!

Wednesday, May 9, 2012

Mother's Day 2012

This weekend people across the country will celebrate their mothers and the women that have touched their lives in a "mother like" context. There are those that don't grow up with their mothers for a multiple of reasons, but grandmothers, aunts, teachers and sometimes just that neighbor down the street will fill the shoes that can only be done by a mother's love.

Mother's Day is one of the most commercial and lucrative holidays for card companies, florists, and restaurants. It's been stated that close to $6 billion dollars are spent annually on these items, including gifts such as spa treatments and jewelry. Believe it or not, It is also considered one of the "holidays" where people go to church that only attend on Easter, Mother's Day and Christmas. Church also made it popular for one to wear a red carnation if your mother is still alive and a white one if she's deceased.

I think it's wonderful to acknowledge mothers, I love the attention bestowed upon me by my children, however, why do we have to honor and uplift the love of mother's just once a year? Instead of spending billions of dollars on things that perish, find out what's your mother's favorite charity and donate to a cause near and dear to her heart. If your mother is deceased, then do something to help another individual in honor of her work. Another idea since it is close to graduation, would be to donate money towards a scholarship in the name of your mother. These are just suggestions that can have a profound impact on others and future generations. What better way to tell your mother you love and appreciate all that she has planted in your life.

Author, Honore de Balzac said: The heart of a mother is a deep abyss at the bottom of which you will always find forgiveness. Amen.

Healing Without Hate: It's a choice. It's a lifestyle. Pass it on!

Saturday, April 14, 2012

Forgiving For Living, Inc., 2012 PLUS Awards

On
Saturday, April 21st Forgiving For
Living, Inc. will hold our 5th Annual PLUS Awards Brunch &
Silent Auction at the prestigious Beverly Hills Hotel in Beverly Hills,
California. Each year we honor
individuals that touch the lives of women and young ladies in a positive and
uplifting manner. This year's honorees are
Byron K. Reed, Vice President Wells Fargo Bank; Bobbie Jean Anderson,
Community Leader; Ana Valdez, Founder & President Valdez Consulting,
Activist & Philanthropist, Maiko Maya, Founder Circle of Charities; Lena Kennedy, Southern
California Chairperson, Women for Obama & Southern California Women's
Health Conference Chair; and the
National Alumnae Association Spelman College Los Angeles. Our entertainment will be provided by Tommy
Johnson and our Master of Ceremonies will be the one and only Chris Schauble,
News Anchor for KTLA.

Forgiving
For Living, Inc., (FFL) was founded in
1999 from my work with young ladies sharing the obstacles I was able to
overcome in my life. FFL is a 501(c) (3) nonprofit organization, established
to provide solutions related to issues of hate, anger, bitterness and the
inability to forgive. FFL’s objective is to help promote and restore mental wellness
and provide mentorship to individuals who have dealt with issues of abuse,
abandonment and low self-esteem while aiding in the restoration of one’s
self-confidence and direction in life on their path to forgiveness. For more
information on FFL and our programs, please visit: www.forgivingforliving.org .

The
support and sponsorship we receive helps to underwrite our mentoring, awareness and
educational programs offered through individual mentoring sessions and support,
our annual conference on Forgiveness, and workshops we collaborate with local
organizations and corporate partnerships.
A portion of the contribution will also go towards Scholarships and our
Financial Literacy Program. We are proud
to announce that four young ladies will receive scholarships at this year's
luncheon. As the world continues to deal
with tensions and conflict in the workplace, relationships, racial/religious
differences and more, forgiveness will increasingly prove to be the viable
necessity for overcoming these challenges.

Healing Without
Hate: It's a choice. It's a lifestyle.
Pass it on!

Visit www.WendyGladney.com & www.forgivingforliving.org. You
can email her at wendy.gladney@gmail.com. Also follow her blog: Wendygladney.blogspot.com. Wendy is featured
on Radio Free 102.3 KJLH on Dominique DiPrima's Front Page Friday Mornings @
5:00am.

Tuesday, April 3, 2012

He Has Risen

The Glory of
Easter...

Holy week is one of
the most special and precious times of the year for Christians. We often hear the phrase at Christmas that
"Jesus is the Reason for the Season," however, I believe that Easter
is the time for Christ to be glorified.

This is the time of
year when we recognize the death, burial and resurrection of Jesus Christ. People from across the world view this season
differently and celebrate it in various ways.
Some are most concerned about their new "Easter" outfit with
their new bonnet, also known as the famous Easter hat. While others get more excited about Easter
baskets, decorating eggs and planning
Easter egg hunts with chocolate covered bunnies. Then there are those that see it only as the beginning
of Springtime and covet the prettiest lawn or garden in the neighborhood.

What I find ironic is
no matter how we think of or celebrate Easter we can't run from the fact that
all of it was created by Him. Some may
say that I am being very opinionated in my view or expression, but at the end
of the day, I am not ashamed of the gospel of Christ and if at no other time,
now is when I can allow my voice to be heard.

Christ claimed victory over the grave with the empty
tomb. "They found the stone rolled away from the tomb, but when they
entered they did not find the body of the Lord Jesus." To me this represents the ultimate
forgiveness!

I wish all of you a
blessed Resurrection Day!

Healing Without Hate: It's a choice. It's a lifestyle. Pass it on!

Visit www.WendyGladney.com & www.forgivingforliving.org. You
can email her at wendy.gladney@gmail.com. Also follow her blog: Wendygladney.blogspot.com. Wendy is featured
on Radio Free 102.3 KJLH on Dominique DiPrima's Front Page Friday Mornings @
5:00am.

Sunday, March 25, 2012

Trayvon Martion Justice Brings Forgiveness

All of us are
familiar with the tragic killing of Trayvon Martin that took place on February
26th by a self appointed neighborhood watchman who's name is George Zimmerman
in Sanford Florida outside of Orlando.
As of the time of this submission George Zimmerman is still a free man
that has not been arrested, while a mother weeps for justice.

We also know from
recordings that Martin realized he was being followed and he asked Zimmerman
why he was following him. Zimmerman
called into 911 reporting that Martin looked suspicious because he was wearing
a "hoodie." Police told
Zimmerman to stand down and wait for the police to get there and yet Zimmerman
disregarded these demands. When police
arrived and Martin was dead, it was reported that Zimmerman stated he acted in
self defense. PLEASE!

As a mother, my heart
goes out to Sybrina Fulton, Trayvon's mother, because I too have a wonderful,
handsome, and promising young African American son. She was reported as saying, "the
investigation won't matter unless the result is in the arrest and prosecution
of George Zimmerman." This mother
is asking for justice.

As many know, I am a
strong advocate for forgiveness. I also
believe in justice. Wanting one does not
cancel out the other. I believe
oftentimes for forgiveness to thrive, justice must exist. A question that many are asking is
"what's so special about this particular young man, black men are killed
almost on a daily basis?" My
response to this is sometimes we get sick and tired of being sick and tired and
enough is enough.

As we close out Women's
History Month, I would like to draw a parallel discussion using Ms. Rosa Parks. Ms. Rosa was not the first African American
woman to refuse giving up her seat to a white person, but she was the right
woman at the right time to cause a nation to have the courage and strength to
take a stand on her behalf. In my
opinion, Trayvon Martin also represents the many African American boys and men
that are innocently killed and have no voice.
The nation is taking a stand from the White House down by letting their
voices be heard and if need be wearing their "hoodie." Let's not let this be another situation where
a young man, a young African American dies in vain.

Healing Without
Hate: It's a choice. It's a lifestyle.
Pass it on!

Visit www.WendyGladney.com & www.forgivingforliving.org. You
can email her at wendy.gladney@gmail.com. Also follow her blog: Wendygladney.blogspot.com. Wendy is featured on
Radio Free 102.3 KJLH on Dominique DiPrima's Front Page Friday Mornings @
5:00am.

Monday, March 12, 2012

FEAR

This morning I woke up and I thought about all the things I want to do in and with my life and I asked myself why I wasn't doing them. Of course there are the practical answers like, I have to make a living, I have people depending on me, I have responsibilities, etc. Then I thought about a statement a friend recently said, "wouldn't life be interesting if we lived without fear." Don't get me wrong, there are some things I believe are good to fear. Growing up as a little girl my grandmother taught us the fear of God, and of course we were afraid of what she would do to us if we acted up, but I'm talking about not fearing what man can or cannot do to or for you.

As I shared this thought with a neighbor who stopped by for a cup of tea, she said, "Wendy you do a lot already, what else do you want to do?" I responded by saying, there are a lot of things running around in my head and I need to get them out. Of course she laughed and said then just get them out. After she left, I pulled out a piece of paper and a pen and I just started writing down all of the things I wanted for my life. I separated them into two categories, personal and professional. I thought about goals and unfinished dreams. Then I thought about what do I need to do to make them happen, when I was honest, I realized the main things I desired to do in my life, it was fear holding me back.

Suddenly as I was writing everything down, I remembered a definition I once read about the word FEAR. False Evidence Appearing Real. Then I thought about what scared me about making that phone call to someone who could help me with a project, or why didn't I just tell someone that they were not the right partner for me, or how bad would it really be if I stuck to exercising and watching what I ate? Sounds funny when I say it out loud or read what I wrote down, but it is true, we are afraid or fear what actually may happen if we're honest, do what we need to do, or step out on faith. I am going to work on doing a better job of letting go of what so easily entangles me and just focus on what is and what can be. I encourage you do to the same.

Marianne Williamson once said (and Nelson Mandela repeated it in his Inauguration Speech in 1994)

"Our deepest fear is not that we are inadequate. Our deepest fear is that we are powerful beyond measure. It is our light, not our darkness that most frightens us....We are all meant to shine, as children do. We were born to make manifest the glory of God that is within us. It's not just in some of us; it's in everyone. And as we let our own light shine, we unconsciously give other people permission to do the same. As we are liberated from our own fear, our presence automatically liberates others."

Healing Without Hate: It's a choice. It's a lifestyle. Pass it on!

Visit www.WendyGladney.com & www.forgivingforliving.org. You can email her at wendy.gladney@gmail.com. Also follow her blog: Wendygladney.blogspot.com. Wendy is featured on Radio Free 102.3 KJLH on Dominique DiPrima's Front Page Friday Mornings @ 5:00am.

Monday, March 5, 2012

MarchWomen's History Month & The Issue of Our Health Rights

March represents the accomplishments women have made across the country. It's interesting women were granted the right to vote in August 1920, but it wasn't until 1981 when Congress authorized and requested the President of the United States to proclaim the week beginning March 7, 1982 to be considered, "Women's History Week.' (Ironic that both Black History Month and Women's History Month started out as just a week!). It would be close to five years later in 1987 when a week went to a month. What's interesting is each year the President still has to issue an annual proclamation confirming March as "Women's History Month."

I think it's ironic, or coincidental, not sure what you would make of it, that we recently experienced the battle over women's health issues around the subject of oral contraceptives being testified by Sandra Fluke. Ms. Fluke testified on behalf of women who will benefit from the Affordable Care Act Contraception Coverage Regulation. Her controversial testimony has caused so many thoughts, words and emotions to fly. She has been called a heroine, a "slut" and a fake to name a few. We've all heard how Rush Limbaugh attacked her calling her "out of her name" and eventually having to apologize. What's interesting is Sandra Fluke said his apology doesn't change anything. She dismissed his statement as insufficient. Ms. Fluke stated that she felt he really wasn't sorry for how he thought, just on his choice of words, (probably pressure from advertisers) as she sought to refocus the discussion on access to contraceptives being a matter of women's rights. In one of his statements, Limbaugh said before a panel of lawmakers as asking, "you and me and the taxpayers" to pay her "to have sex." He said the request made her a "slut" and "prostitute" and would make the American public "pimps."

Fluke argued that oral contraceptives are important for women's health and she focused on its medical uses beyond just preventing pregnancy. Medically there are several reasons women benefit from taking oral contraceptives, one being the problem with cysts. What I find interesting is how a man can pass judgment on something he will personally never understand or have reason to need. Whereas, President Obama personally called Ms. Fluke and extended his support to her for testifying on behalf of all women.

The subject of women's rights whether we are discussing health, trafficking or dealing with equality in the workplace is still an issue on the table that must be fought. Although someone may issue an "apology" and yes, I am totally an advocate of forgiveness, we can't forget the battles that have been fought for the rights of women and those without a voice. If we are not careful we will lose all the gains that have been made. Take this month to find a way to "march" forward in helping the life of a girl or woman to have a better life.

Healing Without Hate: It's a choice. It's a lifestyle. Pass it on!

Visit www.WendyGladney.com & www.forgivingforliving.org. You can email her at wendy.gladney@gmail.com. Also follow her blog: Wendygladney.blogspot.com. Wendy is featured on Radio Free 102.3 KJLH on Dominique DiPrima's Front Page Friday Mornings @ 5:00am.

Monday, February 27, 2012

Awards Season

The first couple of months of each year are brought in by a host of Award Shows and Ceremonies. We've had the Emmy's, the Grammy's, the BET Awards, the NAACP Image Awards, and the Oscar's among others. People go through a lot of changes to prepare for "awards season" with the hope of either getting exposure, making money, or just being in the right place at the right time. In the midst of all of this, life waits for no one and keeps on moving. I felt like every week I would turn around and there was another show that gave honor to someone regarding the entertainment industry. Recently we also just had the Basketball All Stars Weekend, so of course we can't forget sports.

Achieving awards can be a good thing, it helps us to measure if we are doing a good job in our chosen profession or field. The dictionary defines an award as a prize or granting a merit due. However, if we do our life's work with an "award" being the only goal, then we need to take a look at our motives and what really stimulates us to get up each day. We should be motivated to be involved with a life's work that is bigger than us. We are all actually pieces of a puzzle and when we find our place, do our work, the award will be the finished product and a legacy that will live long after all of us are gone.

Now don't get me wrong, I have nothing against awards (giving or receiving). Coming from a background of event planning, many of our jobs were centered around community events giving awards to deserving individuals and companies. Also with my nonprofit, Forgiving For Living, Inc., we also have an annual PLUS Awards (that will be held on April 21st at the Beverly Hills Hotel), but I just wanted to give a little encouragement to many of the workers that are out in the vineyard that may never receive an actual "trophy or plaque" in their hand, don't give up.

I want to close with a saying I often heard growing up in the Baptist Church, "if I can help somebody as I pass along, if I can cheer somebody with a word or song, if I can show somebody, how they are travelling wrong, then my living will not have been in vain." I recently found out that saying came from a song by the one and only, Ms. Mahalia Jackson. Believe in yourself and make it a point to help someone along the journey, they may be your reward and award!

Healing Without Hate: It's a choice. It's a lifestyle. Pass it on!
Visit www.WendyGladney.com & www.forgivingforliving.org. You can email her at wendy.gladney@gmail.com. Also follow her blog: Wendygladney.blogspot.com. Wendy is featured on Radio Free 102.3 KJLH on Dominique DiPrima's Front Page Friday Mornings @ 5am

Monday, February 13, 2012

Miss Whitney Houston

Like so many I was hurt and stunned when I heard the news of the death of Whitney Houston. It's amazing how fast news can hit the streets. Since this tragedy occurred there've been mixed emotions and comments floating around between conversations, television and other forms of media communication. However, the overall sentiment has been that no one can take away the fact God gave her a gift and a voice that we will remember forever.

As I sit and write this article, although the autopsy report has been completed, the results have not been released to the general public. Many say and feel that she died of some sort of overdose or abuse of a controlled substance. Although it is questioned if she ever truly recovered from her substance abuse, she was still loved her, and many wanted to give her the benefit of the doubt. I even heard comments on the red carpet at the Grammy's saying "she was trying...give her that."

I feel that at this point who are any of us to point the finger or pass judgment on what she did or did not do, but rather examine our own lives while we still have breath to breathe and can make a change. If you think about it, we may have a different "addiction," but for the grace of God any of us can be taken out in the blink of an eye.

This past week has been a heavy in so many ways. Even in my own life it has been a week of ups and downs, however, each week I try to check in with people who help me stay centered and focused on the big picture, and one of those people is my "Uncle Mack." This week when we talked he said something very simple, but was exactly what I needed to hear at that very moment..."Just Don't Stop Trying!" That simple, don't stop trying. So my closing words this week to you are whatever you are doing, whatever you are going through, just don't stop trying. Tomorrow can be a better day.

"We will always love you Whitney."

Healing Without Hate: It's a choice. It's a lifestyle. Pass it on!

Visit www.WendyGladney.com & www.forgivingforliving.org. You can email her at wendy.gladney@gmail.com. Also follow her blog: Wendygladney.blogspot.com. Wendy is featured on Radio Free 102.3 KJLH on Dominique DiPrima's Front Page Friday Mornings @ 5:00am.